15 Jul 2024
Letter to Dr. Yang Yao Kun
On days when the pain is more intense and I feel particularly uncomfortable, I often grapple with feelings of regret and anger regarding my surgical experience. To help manage these emotions, I decided to write a letter expressing my thoughts at that time. I then translated it into Chinese and shared a copy with my wife to get her perspective. She subsequently forwarded it to Chairman Wang, asking him to pass it on to the doctor, as we didn’t have Dr. Yang Yao Kun’s direct contact information.
"I'm still in constant pain, it feels like the skin has been removed and a scouring pad placed underneath the skin. I believe the nerve damage hasn't healed yet as the area is still very numb including the side of the penis and upper thigh. I'm beginning to think this is permanent.
I would also like to express that in the meeting you indicated that you didn't agree to a non mesh procedure, however I very clearly remember this, as this is the entire reason for opting for a traditional surgical method. I was insistent on not using a mesh because of concerns for complications. In addition, half way through the procedure my wife was asked for confirmation to use the mesh and upon our first meeting after waking from surgery you actually apologized because you promised to not use a mesh. This confirms to me that it was agreed upon although not written down in the documentation. Something in future I will have to insist on any future procedure for me or my family.
I can also understand that you only indicated that there was a possibility of pressure on the spermatic cord when using a mesh with laparoscopic method. (You only explained that with the laparoscopic approach can cause fertility problems not testicle atrophy and chronic pain). Because of this it was understood that we would use a non mesh technique, so you did not express any details of any complications of this surgery as without a mesh these complications wouldn't exist. Definitely not mention the possibility of permanent nerve damage, chronic pain and the loss of a testicle. A man would remember when a surgeon mentions the loss of a testicle as a potential problem, and with the limited discomfort with the hernia before the operation wouldn't have proceeded.
As it stands even if i was in no pain at the moment, the surgery repair is definitely not worth the loss of a testicle. This surgery is a life changing surgery which i had not anticipated. Its impossible to sit comfortably and at the moment the only joy to life is that given to me by medication.
You may think that its only a testicle there are people with other worse problems. However anyone I've spoken to who has worse medical conditions who has had surgery, has always been better after the surgery not worse. This is why its so hard to come to terms with what has happened. I choose to have this done. God didn't give me this pain, a doctor did.
I apologize for writing this letter. Mentally, I'm struggling with this failed surgery, and I feel writing this to you will help me come to terms with it.
We have already canceled multiple holidays, some which were booked before the surgery for march, not expecting me to be unable to sit for a long period on a plane."
I would also like to express that in the meeting you indicated that you didn't agree to a non mesh procedure, however I very clearly remember this, as this is the entire reason for opting for a traditional surgical method. I was insistent on not using a mesh because of concerns for complications. In addition, half way through the procedure my wife was asked for confirmation to use the mesh and upon our first meeting after waking from surgery you actually apologized because you promised to not use a mesh. This confirms to me that it was agreed upon although not written down in the documentation. Something in future I will have to insist on any future procedure for me or my family.
I can also understand that you only indicated that there was a possibility of pressure on the spermatic cord when using a mesh with laparoscopic method. (You only explained that with the laparoscopic approach can cause fertility problems not testicle atrophy and chronic pain). Because of this it was understood that we would use a non mesh technique, so you did not express any details of any complications of this surgery as without a mesh these complications wouldn't exist. Definitely not mention the possibility of permanent nerve damage, chronic pain and the loss of a testicle. A man would remember when a surgeon mentions the loss of a testicle as a potential problem, and with the limited discomfort with the hernia before the operation wouldn't have proceeded.
As it stands even if i was in no pain at the moment, the surgery repair is definitely not worth the loss of a testicle. This surgery is a life changing surgery which i had not anticipated. Its impossible to sit comfortably and at the moment the only joy to life is that given to me by medication.
You may think that its only a testicle there are people with other worse problems. However anyone I've spoken to who has worse medical conditions who has had surgery, has always been better after the surgery not worse. This is why its so hard to come to terms with what has happened. I choose to have this done. God didn't give me this pain, a doctor did.
I apologize for writing this letter. Mentally, I'm struggling with this failed surgery, and I feel writing this to you will help me come to terms with it.
We have already canceled multiple holidays, some which were booked before the surgery for march, not expecting me to be unable to sit for a long period on a plane."
I wasn't certain if the director would forward the letter to the doctor. I understand that his role is to maintain harmony, and he might view this letter as unhelpful in the current situation.
Timeline
